Let's talk about the forum talk

I've been trying to avoid writing this for a while now, hoping that the problems that have recently popped up could be dealt with quietly in the background.

This is the way I prefer to handle things, but every once in a while -- literally twice in the last couple of years, I think -- the banter in the forums takes an extended turn toward the ugly.

The forums have an environment a lot like a high school. There are the perceived cool kids and the losers. The troublemakers, the comedians, the jocks, the smart kids, the nerds (yes, there's a difference), and the people who stumble in 15 minutes late every day and try to figure out what the heck is going on.

This sometimes leads to drama. And hurt feelings and name-calling and chest-puffing and dignity-defending. There's lots of talk about the girl (or, you know, the running back) you brought to the dance being prettier than girl the other guy brought.

We all show up to the same place day after day, though. We all love our school (or, you know, semoball.com...thank you all very much for that). And even though we may claim to be above all the pettiness and immaturity of the others walking the proverbial halls and tell everyone we want nothing more to get out of this crappy place, we somehow find ourselves in a passionate argument about who should be homecoming queen (or, you know, the Carr Trophy winner) and tearing up when the season is over.

I'm going to stop the analogy here, although I'm tempted to wax on about a big bruhaha about the football team getting new uniforms every year while the girls soccer team has to wear polyester outfits from 1978.

Yesterday we had a legitimate problem on the forums that exploded into quite a back-and-forth. I don't want to rehash and bring new attention to what was said and create the same situation all over again, but you can be assured that the appropriate people were banned from the site. We also had a user post two completely inappropriate words. That user has been suspended. When possible, I like to avoid giving these types of people extra attention, but I suppose it's necessary to let you all know that action is being taken from time to time. Or, you know, humiliate the troublemakers at an assembly in front of the whole student body. (Sorry. I can't stop.)

However, before yesterday, the trouble over the past few weeks has been much different. I will admit that I've found it all to be a bit puzzling and perhaps that's why I haven't said much. If you feel like I've let you down in that regard, I'm sorry.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems to me that most of the trouble has come from people saying "I know you are, but what am I?" over and over again. Person A says something, Person B says something he or she KNOWS will get under the skin of the Person A and then Person A responds with, "Why are you picking on me? Why do you try to make me angry? Now I am angry, so I'll pick on you."

I'm quite honestly not certain how to stop this. I'm not even sure if Person A or Person B (I'm looking at you, rocketsbro. Thanks for owning up to your pot-stirring ways.) is more to blame. Most of the comments do not violate the rules of the forums, and I'm not generally inclined to spend my time stopping silly bickering. It is obvious I went too long without saying anything, though, and it's affecting the conversation. Again, I'm sorry for that.

I would ask that you be a part of the solution. Let the next comment aimed at making you retaliate slide. Skip an opportunity or two to pick on your rival or push another commenter's buttons. I mentioned this in a thread the other day, but we need a truce for a while. We need peace. We need to talk about playoff football and state softball and district volleyball tournaments and not postseason awards and personal identities. [This is a real problem. Please alert me to any posts that attempt to reveal a person's identity. You do not have to like a policy of granting anonymity, but as long as we have it, I will protect it.]

I like sarcasm and good-natured bantering more than most. I'll admit to laughing at some of the "instigating" posts that have upset some of you, but there is a limit to most good things, and it seems we've reached ours.

We're sports fans -- sure we're Sikeston fans and Caruthersville fans and Cape Central fans and Charleston fans, etc. -- but some have allowed those distinctions to become bigger than everything else, and that, just like the gap between the high school cliques, is a shame.