Semoball

High School Basketball Forum: Coach/Mommy & Daddy confrontations

Posted by Bogey Man on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:31 AM:

It's getting worse every year. Back in the day, if you went home crying to mommy and daddy about coach not being fair, and they confronted the coach, you would have been labelled the biggest P- - - Y in school. Now it happens everywhere on a regular basis.

Do others see this happening more and more often?

Replies (43)

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    Sometimes the coach is an idiot and needs to be called out.....especially in little league baseball, etc.

    -- Posted by Jolly Dump on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:36 AM
  • back in the day, coaches weren't drink8ng, sleeping or socializing with students either. so don't just blame the kids.

    -- Posted by kdjones on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:40 AM
  • OK guess I was wrong and we have a bunch of bad coaches.

    -- Posted by Bogey Man on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 12:22 PM
  • Yes, its all over the state. Not as much in St. Louis maybe KC. Mostly rural schools. I was at a game last night and a parent complained about kids making noises when their team shoots free-throws.??? Really, should been at Chaminade-CBC game where the bleachers shook all night long. A kid with a giant belly lined up behind the backboard pulling up his shirt and shaken it during free-throws. It was funny. There was a lot of other too, How would small towns think of something like this. People would say DERESCTFUL. No it's not. I for one loved the "Old Sikeston- Notre Dame Prep clubs to name a few. But remember parents complaining at other school's about Sikeston or ND's fans of the rural schools. It's part of the game but is a lot different than the big schools. Schoolboard stuff and etc. City schoolkids can't tell you, who's on the Board. Most kids do know in small schools. SO mommy's and Daddys are heard and seen and only FOOLS listen. Parents confront Board members constantly. Parents are all about their boy. These parents should buy their son a trophy. I know guys who had to pick up rocks on a farm if he had a bad game... Bogey Man it's different day and age. Sounds like your getting older.. LOL

    -- Posted by country-dude on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 12:34 PM
  • just whot u talkin bout county-dud. u talkin bout chmainade cbc whot is just that Bucko? can you splain it to me bub?

    -- Posted by bearcat1forall on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 12:55 PM
  • I like what country-dude commented when he mentioned complaints about students making noise when the other team shoots free-throws. They are routing on their team. It's not about being a bad sport; it is about wanting the kid to miss so their team can win. As long as there is no name calling, etc., then parents and all fans should be fine with it.

    -- Posted by doubleplay on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 12:59 PM
  • I agree with BogeyMan on this one (shocker, I know). Unless the coach is being abusive or doing something illegal, it just makes the kid and the parents look like babies.

    country-dude, I'm with you, I kind of miss the student sections going back and forth. Some of the small school fans definitely hated it/felt disrespected. Anymore, there isn't a whole lot of interaction between student sections. Couple of weak, lame, overdone chants, some pointing at each other and making noises...and that's about it. The best student section I've ever seen was Borgia. They were always HUGE, loud, all on the same page, and had some incredibly clever chants. And they managed to do it without being ugly, which is something a lot of schools could take a lesson on. Cape, Jackson, Sikeston, and ND all had some pretty rowdy student sections a few years back, but at one point or another they have all taken it a bit too far with personal attacks or lewd chants.

    -- Posted by FarmBoy06 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:01 PM
  • Ithink ya'll all got off track from the original post !!!!

    -- Posted by uno49 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:06 PM
  • Sorry, uno49.

    Anyway, like we were saying, that Super Bowl should be a dandy this weekend.

    -- Posted by FarmBoy06 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:12 PM
  • Wow kdjones. That might be top 5 the dumbest thing ever written on the internet.

    Society is soft. Too many people have a right to complain/excuse/and justify and too many also have the right to not take responsibility for their actions.

    If you don't believe this, just ask someone.

    -- Posted by ozzyandharriet on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:18 PM
  • I liked Borgia. I liked the Poplar Bluff crowd at Columbia against Vashon. Pep Clubs are sometimes the difference between winning and losing. Mad parents are the reason for losing and if wanted to coach, go to school and coach your kid. Plain and simple. Ard bearcat, CBS-Lickamade r the best pepcouch I've seen dis year, Bucko

    -- Posted by country-dude on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:39 PM
  • Alot and I mean alot of times these kids are led to believe they are the greatest players ever by these parents and then when game time comes they dont play and well you know the rest. School boards need to stand up and put the power back in the coaches hands, what coach says is final

    -- Posted by Semoball68 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 1:46 PM
  • When fouled and questioned who shoots the free-throws, good coaches teaches his best shooter to walk to the line to shoot. Refs sometimes don't catch this. A parent yells from the stands, it's my boy who should shoot the free-throws. Refs let the best shooter shoot. After the game was over the parents want to have a meeting with the coach and principal on why the coach didn't make the refs let their boy shoot the freethrows. I've seen it all I think.

    -- Posted by country-dude on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 2:00 PM
  • I would think that if a parent would confront a coach it would make it worse for the kid. I may get upset if my son doesn't play but I'd never confront a coach I'd just tell my son to work harder and earn a spot and that's what he does.

    -- Posted by TFA on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 3:53 PM
  • I would even go so far as to say that I wouldn't mind a parent calling out a coach if they feel they're too harsh when criticizing players (depending on the circumstances). But regarding decisions made by the coach, from playing time to being benched to offensive/defensive strategies...no way.

    -- Posted by FarmBoy06 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 3:57 PM
  • Country-dude, look at the schools you referenced. Almost all of them are private schools. The dumbing down of public schools and having to make EVERYTHING fair is a huge part of the problem. The public school system is FAILING our kids in sports and education....Another big problem is the invention of "elite" and "travel" teams. They are the ruination of youth sports. Because at the ripe old age of 8, little Johnny's parents drive him all over the Midwest, blowing his college fund they set up for an education, and telling him "don't worry, you'll get a college basketball scholarship "....Six years later, little Johnny quits basketball because he's burned out and wonders why they never went to the beach for vacation...I think we know the answer.

    -- Posted by BonScott on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 4:10 PM
  • *

    I once played ball for a moron of a coach. I will not give his name. But this guy would always start his son at 2nd or 3rd base every single game and would leave him there, no matter that his son would be screaming and hollering because he wanted to play OF. Because of his tantrum the kid did not even field his position and the balls would get past him.

    Finally, my parents and some other parents had enough of this and demanded that the coach do something about his kid or that the school do something about the coach. The coach refused to do anything about his son and was let go by the school board.

    -- Posted by Jolly Dump on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 4:12 PM
  • bogey man you're spot on. I know of some girls teams in the bootheel area that are playing subpar ball because of parents taking the TEAM aspect out of basketball. they want their kid to be top scorer each night, break the 1000 point mark, or score 30 whether the teams wins or loses. this makes coaching very difficult.

    -- Posted by courtobserver on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 4:33 PM
  • Parents have the luxury of only worrying about their kid. Coaches have the "luxury" of having to worry about the other four on the floor or eight on the field.

    -- Posted by DexterResident1976 on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 6:18 PM
  • Traveling/elite youth teams are as bad as they get. I live in a town where traveling elementary teams are king. Some parents can't wait to get their kids playing, some in first or second grade! hahahaha And then you have the other parents who succumb to the pressure and allow their children to play for fear they will "fall behind". Which is garbage. It's also no coincidence that in this same town many kids who were(like bonscott already stated) running around with super mom and super dad playing 670 games a summer(slight exaggeration, but you get the point) are not even playing the sport by the time they get a drivers license. That idiocy in it's purest form to me.

    Regarding coaches. Of course you're going to have a moron of a coach just like you're going to have a moron of a mom, a moron of a police officer, a moron of a mail carrier or whatever. I agree with farmboy that no coach should ever have to explain why a kid is or isn't playing and should never have to justify strategy or technique. If a line is crossed than it's up to administration to fix the problem. If administration can't fix the problem then, AND ONLY THEN, the school board should get involved.

    -- Posted by jwhitlock on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 6:54 PM
  • Ozzyandharriet, I agree with the post, just pointing out the facts about the coaches also. If you are going to criticize the players, don't leave out the coaches who are entrusted by the parents for them to lead their children. I have noticed that the maturity level of the coaches these days have fallen off dramatically from 30 years ago when I played. What is so dumb about my statement, this us a discussion board, elaborate, please!!!!

    -- Posted by kdjones on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:09 PM
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    Sikeston wins 66-54 to improve to 10-7.

    -- Posted by yah-yah on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:16 PM
  • *

    Whoops, wrong forum...

    -- Posted by yah-yah on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:17 PM
  • What's dumb is that you insinuate that this sort of behavior didn't exist 30 years ago, as if it just started 20, 15, or 10 years ago.

    -- Posted by ozzyandharriet on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:44 PM
  • If you really watch music from 30 years ago it had many instances of coaches/teachers sleeping with students... Hot for Teacher, Hello? Is it Me your looking for, etc...

    Country dude, I disagree that a good coach sends his best free-throw shooter to the line, that is cheating. Period. A good coach trys to teach all his kids to shoot free-throws and to understand that being a true sportsman is more important than winning one game.

    By rule it is a technical foul if the wrong person attends the line

    -- Posted by Areaguy on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:50 PM
  • it didn't happen as much 30 years ago and your statement is dumb.

    -- Posted by kdjones on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:53 PM
  • BTW ozzyandharriet, you are so offended, ypu must be a coach with a guilty coaches.

    -- Posted by kdjones on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:55 PM
  • LOL, it did Kd, it just wasn't reported as much. I was in high school back then.. most of my coaches dated some of our girls in high school.

    -- Posted by Areaguy on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 7:58 PM
  • That's right. I'm a coach. Because only a coach would say something like that. LOL.

    "guilty coaches"? I'm unaware of such condition. Hahahaha

    You're not nearly smart enough to determine whether I'm a coach or not, let alone whether im offended. Besides, one doesn't have to get offended to refute such statements that are lacking in sense.

    -- Posted by ozzyandharriet on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 8:46 PM
  • This is what happened, the rebound comes off hard and the two kids are blocking out. The other player comes over both boys back. The ref saw that he was the best shooters back more than the other kid. Kinda what would have called also. Point being, it's the coaches job to tell the ref something that only that parent saw? Really? And want a meeting?? I haven't to the been back to that school to hear how that all turned out. Ozzy. bon, Whitlock, jones, bogey farm great posts. Truth.... Don't get me started on AAU....

    -- Posted by country-dude on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 10:26 PM
  • Country-dud- "prep club"?

    -- Posted by Hatershate on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:03 PM
  • Pep club what Hater? I agree with Farm, I miss them only to the level of cussing, personalizing certain players and etc. Pep Clubs have dropped off a lot here lately as Farm pointed out. Would like to see more. That's it.

    -- Posted by country-dude on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:21 PM
  • Country-dud- "prep club"?

    -- Posted by Hatershate on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:03 PM

    I think you know what he meant junior...

    -- Posted by BonScott on Wed, Jan 28, 2015, at 11:23 PM
  • It all falls back on what the school district is willing to put up with.

    Strong administrators (those with a spine), and a well-educated school board should not tolerate such behavior from parents.

    -- Posted by Slim shady on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 7:35 AM
  • -- Posted by georgeh on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 7:35 AM

    You hit it on the head. That's exactly right, and would solve a huge portion of the problem. The days of coaches being at schools for 20+ years is over and it's kind of a shame.

    -- Posted by BonScott on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 8:51 AM
  • This is the situation......parents coach their kids from the time they are babies, and they just absolutely cannot let go when it's time for the kid to go to high school. Plus, since they "coached their kid in this tournament for 5 years," they obviously know more about the sport than coaches. As the old adage goes, parents always want the best players AND their kid on the floor/field.

    I raise some questions:

    Parents, when is the last time you have actually coached against another coach who does this professionally? Getting scouting reports, preparing for games, etc? Have you ever had to deal with this, or do you normally coach against other parents who, like you, are just living vicariously through their kid because you can't let go of your glory days?

    Parents, do you realize that coaches (again, who do this professionally) generally teach and deal with hundreds of kids each day, and are educated to do so? That they have the best interest of the TEAM in mind, not just your son/daughter? That they are held accountable by Athletic Directors and community members as a whole, and they aren't just doing this for fun so they can take a mini trip and get pizza after the game?

    Parents, do you realize that there is so much more to coaching at a high school level than just organizing a sign up and putting gas in the mini van? Coaches have budgets, assistants evaluations, bus scheduling, academics/eligibility, safety precautions (concussions), rules tests, parents to deal with (yes you), and this list could go ON...

    And lastly........Parents, did you stop and think BEFORE you ever let your kid play a sport that there is a REALLY GOOD CHANCE that they aren't very good, and an even smaller chance that they are going to play this sport in college? Are you really that naive to truly believe that your kids is THAT GOOD? If your kid was as good as you think, do you honestly believe the coach wouldn't have them playing? Do you think coaches are actively trying to lose?

    -- Posted by Razor on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 9:55 AM
  • "And lastly" is the biggest problem. Most cases I've seen with parents confronting the coach over playing time has been with delusional parents who think their child is better than they actually are.

    -- Posted by Bogey Man on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 11:24 AM
  • razor are u just the rassler of of wwf name razor ramond? i member he got toothstoned by the undie taker won match Bucko. whot you doin on a sparts form bub? did u now Undre the giant bub? he was big ole boy Bucko.

    -- Posted by bearcat1forall on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 11:27 AM
  • Parents who question their kids playing time should first question their practice time.

    -- Posted by Dragon & Warrior Fan on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 11:29 AM
  • Well said Razor..

    -- Posted by country-dude on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 2:23 PM
  • Every Parent thinks their Kid is Superior.

    Was like this 30 years ago and it's like that today. This will not change. Period.

    As long as Coaches Play to Win, I guarantee the best kids will be on the floor the most.

    Thing is, High School Athletics is 80% heart and 20% natural ability. The kids with Heart will do whatever it takes to play. This boils down to Practice, more Practice and some additional Practice.

    Daniel Coyle wrote a book on this: "The Talent Code". He went to some of the worlds hot beds for Tennis, Soccer and Music. Low and Behold, what did all these places do better and more of than anyone else?

    PRACTICE

    -- Posted by UFO on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 3:23 PM
  • Posted by UFO on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 3:23 PM

    I agree, this has been going on for a long time. But there are two big differences between then and now: 1) Social Media; I think it hurts as much as it helps, especially with teenagers. 2)Lack of authority/respect; coaches can't truly coach and discipline anymore in the fear of getting suspended or fired because they told little Johnny to run the bleachers for cussing and not showing up to practice in time. Now days parents defend their kids actions instead of supporting the coach and busting their kids a** when they get home....Good luck to all coaches, because I would be fired after the first month...:)

    -- Posted by BonScott on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 3:57 PM
  • Glad I'm not like any of these parents you're talking about.

    -- Posted by TFA on Thu, Jan 29, 2015, at 4:11 PM

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